Noah Kahan Jokes Congress Should Mandate Diapers at Shows

*Noah Kahan performs onstage on March 16, 2026 in Austin, Texas. (Robin Marchant/Getty Images for Netflix)*

Noah Kahan is jokingly looking to Congress for help after another report that someone relieved themselves in the crowd during one of his concerts.

The issue has continued at shows by the “Stick Season” artist, with concertgoers reportedly using their seats instead of the proper facilities.

Back in June, after it was reported that someone had defecated in their seats during his show, Kahan posted, “If you have to poop at a show please dear god just go to the bathroom lmao.” A month later, a fan reported that someone used a section at Citi Field as their own personal toilet to urinate into during Kahan’s show at the New York City stadium over the weekend.

Kahan addressed the latest bodily waste incident during his show in Washington, D.C, on Wednesday, working it into a bit during “Dial Drunk.”

As he pretended to talk on a payphone, Kahan took a call from “Congress,” which tells him that “people have been pissing all over the floor at my shows, as well.”

“You guys are ordering by act of Congress that everyone has to wear diapers before they get in? Is that what we’ve come to?” Kahan continued.

He concluded, “Alright, you heard Congress, f****** put some diapers on next time, y’all.”

Kahan does have some connection to legislative matters. He supported a bill in his home state of Vermont that would cap ticket resale prices, which passed in May, and he is also backing a similar bill proposal in Massachusetts.

Kahan is currently on tour in support of his new album, The Great Divide.

This article was adapted from original reporting by ABC Audio, as featured on 105.7 The Point.